One of ours has his very own solution...
Scooter Back to Front
I have noticed, between howls,
Scooters’ new taste for paper towels,
whether Bounty, Brawny, pick a size,
he chews them all, prefers two-plys,
He knocks a roll down on the floor,
then Panther pounces to settle the score
As he seizes the roll with his savage claws,
chomps right in with his untamed jaws,
and gnaws it along in typewriter rows
like an ear of sweet summer corn
There’s must be a reason, perhaps it’s that,
Scoot’s not the cleanliest of cats,
For his fur gets stuck, with only what
we'll call " ‘duh poops ‘dere" on his butt,
Relief from which makes him desperate
enough to squat on the carpet,
to raises his back legs in the air,
and whether we watch, he just don’t care,
As he drags his rear by his strong front claws
defying all known household laws!
Determined to put a stop to that,
I found his comb, I caught the cat, Then while I combed his tough poop knots
he decided he’d jump - with all he’s got,
But I didn’t let go the comb,
I just held him up there, suspended,
until the fur pulled out,
(and he didn’t land on his feet)
Still, he must conceive some efficacy
to eat paper towels as a delicacy,
Perhaps he’s cured what ails his croup,
by
inventing new self wiping poops!
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